i get my feelings hurt, and then later i smile.  as it exists right now, i get a little sad or anxious only when i misunderstand. when i allow myself to read things in that aren’t there. when i want an excuse to be a little bit sad. the days, the moments, that i want a different outcome or circumstance, but i have no clear path to get there. right now, its a pipe dream, that will remain a pipe dream until something changes that forces our hand- either together or apart. right now, its just something i think about. right now, i do my best to not let you matter more then you should. right now, i try very hard to just let us be, in whatever capacity that means for each of us. i can see down the road, but i cant see right now. right now goes on just the way it is so long as i can keep from wanting it to be something else, which will turn happy into unhappy and eventually just be removed. im trying to keep it together. i want to

About mudly

Mud is main blog writer extraordinaire, picture guru, and the garden and adventure instigator. She loves to cook, but doesn’t much like following a recipe. She also loves typewriters, the color turquoise, and wearing tie dye with stripes. And she dorks out on permies.com while dreaming up and planning her next garden.

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